353:, promoted the use of the idiom "to lift one's luggage", meaning to supply sexual pleasure to, or derive it from, one's partner. This originated from Rekers who, when outed, insisted he had hired the escort only to assist him with lifting his luggage. Rekers also claimed he "spent a great deal of time sharing scientific information on the desirability of abandoning homosexual intercourse" and "shared the gospel of Jesus Christ with him in great detail".
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In a July 20, 2011 column, Savage coined the term "monogamish", applying it to his own relationship with his partner. The term describes couples who are "mostly" but not 100% monogamous; such couples have an understanding that allows for some amount of sexual activity outside the relationship. Savage
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with respect to sexual acts. Savage invited his readers to create a sex-related definition for "santorum" to "memorialize the
Santorum scandal by attaching his name to a sex act that would make his big, white teeth fall out of his big, empty head." The winning definition was "the frothy mixture of
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or experience between the partners, the older or more experienced partner has the responsibility to leave the younger or less experienced partner in at least as good a state (emotionally and physically) as before the relationship. The "campsite rule" includes things like leaving the younger or less
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that, while Adams followed the "campsite rule" – Breedlove did not claim that Adams had given him any diseases or caused him emotional trauma, and in fact still refers to Adams as a friend – Breedlove violated the "tea and sympathy" rule by making public statements that he knew could ruin Adams'
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Originally Savage suggested that "lifting my luggage" refer to listening to the speaker expound on the "desirability" of converting oneself from homosexual to heterosexual. Later, after several political humorists started employing "lifting your luggage" as an implicit or explicit reference to
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and Beau
Breedlove, who had allegedly begun a sexual relationship with Adams almost immediately after turning 18, Savage created a companion rule to the "campsite rule", now known as the "tea and sympathy rule". The rule is a reference to a line in the
105:. Savage "made the offhand comment that forever altered life: 'Make sure your paper has an advice column – everybody claims to hate 'em, but everybody seems to read 'em'." He typed up a sample column, and to his surprise Keck offered him the job.
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lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex." Savage set up a website to spread the term, inviting bloggers and others to link to it, which caused it to rise to the top of a Google search for
Santorum's name.
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of the word into a positive description for gay guys. Using this word worked when the readers were LGBT, but as the column grew popular, Savage changed to a generic greeting to better match the expectations of the general public.
144:(which publishes his column) that he began the column with the express purpose of providing mocking advice to heterosexuals, since most straight advice columnists were "clueless" when responding to letters from gay people.
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A tolyamorous person is someone in a monogamous relationship who knows that their partner occasionally has sex with somebody else, and is willing to put up with it and turn a blind eye. The word is similar to
329:"How'd that happen?", a mock-incredulous reply to those who write in and say they had certain (often sexual) things "happen to" them, as if they had no part or say in the incident, when they clearly did.
249:, in which a much older woman asks of a high-school-age boy, right before having sex with him: "Years from now, when you talk about this – and you will – be kind." Savage claimed in an article in
849:, www.good.is, May 9, 2012 (accessed December 26, 2012) ("Dan is best known for two things: his advice that partners in any relationship strive to be Good, Giving, and Game (GGG) and ...").
54:. The column appears weekly in several dozen newspapers, mainly free newspapers in the US and Canada, but also newspapers in Europe and Asia. It started in 1991 with the first issue of the
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Savage often uses the expression "dump the mother-fucker already" (DTMFA), at the close of a response, recommending that the writer immediately end an abusive or worthless relationship.
422:, the column defined "saddlebacking" as "the phenomenon of Christian teens engaging in unprotected anal sex in order to preserve their virginities". The term is a play on the word "
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A reader of Savage Love suggested the initialisation ITMFA, a take on DTMFA, meaning "Impeach the
Motherfucker Already!" The initialisation was coined in reference to the
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believes that, of all the couples that people think are 100% monogamous, a lot of them are more "monogamish" than people realize. The term has since seen mainstream use.
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In 2001, Savage challenged readers of his column to coin a name for the sex act in which a woman uses a strap-on
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many offensive words. For the first six years of the column, he had his readers address him with "Hey,
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version of the column, featuring telephone advice sessions. Podcasts are released every
Tuesday.
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Savage coined "GGG", "good, giving, and game", and it means one should strive to be
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various sexual acts, Savage suggested that "whatever lifts your luggage" supplant "
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Deborah Kerr, Actress Known for
Genteel Grace and a Sexy Beach Kiss, Dies at 86
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on her male partner. After multiple nominations and a reader vote, the verb "
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Savage reacted strongly to statements made about homosexuality by former
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Savage Love: Straight
Answers from America's Most Popular Sex Columnist
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Savage Love: Straight
Answers from America's Most Popular Sex Columnist
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The
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column, bought at auction after the noted advice columnist died.
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899:"Colbert Rips Anti-Gay Activist, Throws 'Rentboy' Dance Party"
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1249:"Toly, Tolyamory, Tolyamorous - All Things Toly! - Dan Savage"
932:"Baptist minister 'took ten-day holiday with male prostitute'"
903:"Colbert Rips Anti-Gay Activist, Throws 'Rentboy' Dance Party"
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During the run of Savage Love, Savage has popularized several
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in 2006, but was reintroduced in 2017 in reaction to the
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In any relationship, but particularly those with a large
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Beckett, Cooper S.; Miller, Lyndzi (October 14, 2022).
309:"equal time and equal pleasure" to one's partner, and
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to help start an alternative weekly newspaper titled
955:"About.com --Daniel Kurtzman's Political Humor Blog"
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491:Savage introduced this neologism on episode 900 of
112:", then asking their question. Savage's intent was
1433:The Commitment: Love, Sex, Marriage, and My Family
772:"Savage Love Readers Talk About the Campsite Rule"
515:"Listen to This: Savage Lovecast with Dan Savage"
67:Since October 2006, Savage has also recorded the
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414:Virginity § Definitions of virginity loss
131:Savage stated in a February 2006 interview in
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601:. Podcasts.thestranger.com. Archived from
396:", popularized by the sex education movie
349:, Dan Savage, along with others including
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400:released in 1998, was chosen, with a 43%
120:Since 2002, he has written the column at
1096:, June 21, 2001. Accessed April 7, 2013.
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864:"Science proves it: Dan Savage is right"
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1150:Excerpt from Santorum in an interview
436:Campaign for the neologism "santorum"
19:For the book by the same author, see
451:in an April 2003 interview with the
1001:Luscombe, Belinda (July 17, 2014).
862:DebHerbenick (September 12, 2012).
826:"Impeach the Motherfucker Already!"
742:Dan Savage (December 23–29, 2004).
513:Raptopoulos, Lilah (July 2, 2014).
13:
1207:"Rick Santorum's Anal Sex Problem"
1029:Oppenheimer, Mark (June 3, 2011).
695:Accomazzo, David (July 13, 2013).
547:Strimpel, Zoe (January 31, 2023).
404:over runners-up "bob" and "punt".
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184:" (pl. "scrota") as an insult.
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628:"GLBTQ Literature: Dan Savage"
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85:In 1991, Savage was living in
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1292:Relationship Training Courses
975:Savage, Dan (July 20, 2011).
901:Abramson, Dan (May 6, 2010).
697:"The Evolution of Dan Savage"
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2125:Terminology of homosexuality
1031:"Married, with Infidelities"
281:presidency of George W. Bush
220:experienced partner with no
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630:. GLBTQ.com. Archived from
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644:Dan Savage, Introduction,
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811:The Tea and Sympathy Rule
380:Pegging (sexual practice)
359:whatever floats your boat
317:, and the invention of a
297:Safe, sane and consensual
201:intellectual disabilities
187:Savage has also tried to
2181:The Stranger (newspaper)
938:. London. Archived from
207:" rhymes with "retard".
1061:. Thorntree Press LLC.
770:Q, Dan (May 14, 2008).
259:
2161:LGBTQ-related podcasts
1342:It Gets Better Project
361:" in common parlance.
339:"rent boy" allegations
324:
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23:. For other uses, see
1627:Girlfriend experience
1205:Mencimer, Stephanie.
446:United States Senator
247:play of the same name
232:Tea and sympathy rule
35:
1173:"Bill, Ashton, Rick"
680:, op. cit., pp. 1–5.
252:The Portland Mercury
226:unwanted pregnancies
46:is a syndicated sex-
2151:2006 podcast debuts
1365:Columns and podcast
907:The Huffington Post
667:, February 8, 2006.
605:on December 6, 2010
398:Bend Over Boyfriend
2084:In popular culture
2040:Golden Age of Porn
1287:Spreading Santorum
1131:. April 23, 2003.
1035:The New York Times
847:"The GGG Cocktail"
800:The New York Times
497:in January 2024.
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1090:We Have a Winner!
1068:978-1-952125-22-5
884:Wrong & Right
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1980:Ass to mouth
1932:/stone femme
1672:Motherfucker
1607:Donkey punch
1508:Sexual slang
1458:
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1391:The Stranger
1389:
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1357:Bibliography
1281:The Stranger
1279:
1256:. Retrieved
1252:
1243:
1231:. Retrieved
1227:
1218:
1211:Mother Jones
1210:
1201:
1194:The Stranger
1193:
1190:"Gas Huffer"
1184:
1177:The Stranger
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1088:Dan Savage,
1084:
1072:. Retrieved
1057:
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981:The Stranger
980:
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940:the original
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887:
882:Dan Savage,
878:
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830:The Stranger
829:
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781:December 11,
779:. Retrieved
775:
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755:February 16,
753:. Retrieved
749:The Stranger
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721:The Stranger
719:
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632:the original
607:. Retrieved
603:the original
599:"Dan Savage"
593:
581:. Retrieved
577:
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556:. Retrieved
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530:. Retrieved
519:The Guardian
518:
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172:", and the "
162:donkey punch
151:
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102:The Stranger
100:
90:
84:
68:
66:
61:The Stranger
59:
43:
42:
29:
2120:Sexual slur
1972:pornography
1930:Stone butch
1910:Gay-for-pay
1860:Chickenhawk
1772:Turkey slap
1737:Snowballing
1722:Serosorting
1577:Cum tribute
1562:Circle jerk
1557:Chickenhead
1409:Savage Love
1373:Savage Love
1276:Savage Love
1258:January 29,
1253:savage.love
1233:January 26,
1224:"Instagram"
960:October 21,
583:October 21,
558:October 21,
532:October 21,
479:Tolyamorous
424:barebacking
388:to perform
158:initialisms
126:Ann Landers
73:, a weekly
44:Savage Love
2171:Dan Savage
2166:Neologisms
2145:Categories
2070:Stunt cock
2055:Money shot
2010:Downblouse
1990:Centerfold
1925:Soft butch
1840:Bugchasing
1830:Bi-curious
1792:Whale tail
1757:Teabagging
1632:Glory hole
1542:Blue balls
1328:Dan Savage
1040:January 8,
1014:January 8,
986:January 8,
744:"No Shit?"
501:References
465:bestiality
412:See also:
365:Monogamish
341:regarding
295:See also:
264:"Cheating
154:neologisms
52:Dan Savage
37:Dan Savage
2050:MILF/DILF
2030:Gang bang
1870:Cottaging
1712:Red wings
1552:Camel toe
1159:USA Today
1137:0734-7456
1129:USA Today
936:The Times
776:Scatmania
609:March 19,
527:0261-3077
486:polyamory
402:plurality
242:Sam Adams
141:A.V. Club
133:The Onion
92:The Onion
2176:Sexology
2115:Sexology
2020:Felching
2000:Cum shot
1995:Creampie
1880:Down-low
1657:Mama-san
1642:Hot Karl
1617:Felching
1567:Cornhole
1527:Bareback
1335:Activism
912:June 12,
461:polygamy
430:Santorum
390:anal sex
319:cocktail
305:in bed,
256:career.
197:retarded
174:hot Karl
168:", the "
164:", the "
148:Language
2103:Related
2075:Upskirt
2065:Rosebud
2060:Paysite
2025:Fluffer
1985:Bukkake
1890:Fag hag
1855:Chicken
1835:Breeder
1742:Soaking
1727:Shemale
1707:Quickie
1692:Pegging
1637:Hogging
1602:Dogging
1515:General
1460:The Kid
1452:Theatre
1417:The Kid
374:Pegging
315:OkCupid
205:leotard
189:reclaim
182:scrotum
97:Seattle
81:History
75:podcast
56:Seattle
2045:Insert
2035:Gokkun
2015:Facial
1895:Femboy
1787:Wanker
1752:Switch
1697:Pirate
1677:Nookie
1612:Douche
1572:Cougar
1547:Bottom
1522:Banjee
1463:(2010)
1444:(2011)
1436:(2005)
1428:(2002)
1420:(1999)
1412:(1998)
1154:bigamy
1135:
1065:
525:
463:, and
457:incest
307:giving
193:faggot
170:pirate
110:faggot
39:(2005)
1956:Twink
1951:Troll
1946:Trade
1936:Swish
1920:Queen
1905:Fruit
1900:Femme
1875:Daddy
1850:Butch
1825:Beard
1797:Whore
1702:Pussy
1401:Books
869:Salon
386:dildo
224:, no
178:pussy
136:'
2093:fuck
1885:Dyke
1865:Chub
1820:Bear
1815:Bara
1777:Twat
1762:Tits
1732:Slut
1622:Fuck
1592:Dick
1582:Cunt
1260:2024
1235:2024
1133:ISSN
1076:2023
1063:ISBN
1042:2015
1016:2015
1008:Time
988:2015
962:2010
914:2013
783:2013
757:2012
729:2008
611:2011
585:2023
560:2023
534:2023
523:ISSN
438:and
311:game
303:good
260:CPOS
222:STDs
156:and
1970:In
1767:Top
1662:Mat
1537:BBC
1278:at
394:peg
325:HTH
291:GGG
50:by
2147::
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27:.
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